Loving You: "The Amorie Shoe"
I can see my mother’s head wrapped in her bright dominican scarf peeking through the doorway every minute (literally), keeping an eye on us. Seriously, mom? Ugh. It’s about to be 11pm and she is still in the kitchen next door cooking up a storm.
We’re watching a movie together - Sergio and I - in the living room. I’m in my PJs, hair tied up, and cleansed face (no make up on tonight). I have spent the whole afternoon studying for college exams. I just want to relax and shut my brain off…
Is he staring at me? I can feel Sergio’s eyes on me. I think he caught himself because he abruptly turns back to the TV screen and leans his head back on the couch.
5 minutes later...Why is he staring at me so much? Is there something on my face? At this point, I’m starting to feel a bit anxious, so I lean forward hoping to escape his gaze. He puts his hand gently on my back, and I turn to look at him. “Hey,” he whispers with a smile, his head relaxed on the couch. I let out a nervous chuckle and turn away. He's cute when he flirts.
“Hey,” he says again. This time he leans forward and looks me straight in the eyes. I have that weird sensation that he’s truly seeing me right now - all of me - even the parts I’ve been trying to keep hidden behind my walls. Something about his gaze brought my guard down. I feel completely vulnerable. In a split second I can feel the blood rushing to my face and I suddenly have this fear that he doesn’t like what he sees. I look down. I can't believe I let him in (to my heart).
And just when I’m about to get up to shake off the feeling, he says to me, “I’m in love with you.”
I blink three times. Did I hear that right???
He assures me again: “There are many people I can live with, but you’re the one person I can’t live without. I’ve fallen in love with you.”
It’s hard to find people who will accept you and love you for who you are. Have you noticed how easy it is to single out the negative aspects in others and in ourselves? When someone comes along to show us kindness and extend a hand of friendship, we question their intentions. Not so much because we don’t know if we’ll get along, but because we’re afraid they’ll run when they see past the mask we’re wearing. Will they accept me with my past, my mistakes, my issues? Will they try to change me or reject me otherwise? Can they handle my bold personality or lack thereof?
It’s hard to point out the positive things and see the beauty in our cracks and edges. So, when someone comes along who is willing to accept you just as you are, don’t take them for granted. Those are the ones who will stick by you through thick and thin; who will push you to be better, but still love you even if nothing changes; and who will remind you how amazing you are when you can see nothing good in yourself.
Always remember that there are many people you can live with, but the ones who ‘see you’ - your good and your bad - and can still whisper, “I love you,” are the ones worth holding on to. Those are the ones you can’t live without!
I want to wish my husband a Happy Birthday and thank him for loving me and accepting me just as I am! Sergio, I wouldn't trade your love for anything in this world...I love you with all my heart!
Each post is named after a pair of "fictitious" (for now) shoes. For this post, I chose the name "Amorie," which means love.