7 "I told you so" Lessons Revisited: The "Zoe" Shoe
Remember the teenage days when grown up advice felt so outdated? Mom and dad would sit you down for advice, but you just rolled your eyes and thought to yourself, they don’t get it - it’s a different time now. Now, 5, 10, 15 years later you find yourself confronting situations where the information they shared seems to be more relevant than ever. And you can’t help but wonder, how did they know that I would go through this?!
As a parent now, I’m realizing that while the times may change, the way people are innately wired doesn’t. And because relationships and interactions with others make up the bulk of our time here on earth, there are life principles that transcend any era. Those are the valuable lessons our parents and guardians have passed down to us and the ones I will one day also pass down to my children.
So, today’s post is dedicated to the top 7 lessons I revisited in 2017. I made some changes in 2018 due to these and, let me tell you, I’m enjoying life so much more! I hope you’ll be able to reflect and be encouraged to make any changes in your life you feel necessary!
- Don’t make assumptions. When you make assumptions, you create your own conclusions without any hard proof, which makes you feel entitled to judge people according to your unconfirmed truth. This level of thinking is what burns bridges, ruins relationships, produces unnecessary frustration, and is just plain selfish. So, before jumping to any conclusions, just ASK the party involved. Trust me, you’ll be glad you did!
It’s OK to outgrow relationships that are not benefiting your growth. Growth implies development. As you develop, you must know that some people may not develop with you. It’s OK to say goodbye to those relationships and go separate ways. There don’t have to be any hard feelings. Some relationships are only meant for seasons and we don’t need to force relationships to be something they aren’t anymore.
Worrying about things you can’t control is wasted energy. Most of the things we worry about are things that are beyond reasonable for us. We aren’t superheros and we can’t save the world, including our own. Worry only robs us of our mental peace and makes us physically stressed and ill. When has worrying about a situation ever solved your problem? So, why do it?! Instead, focus on what’s within your control and leave the rest of it to God.
Your time is precious, so value it because no one else will for you! You may want to be available for everyone who needs you. But you only have 24 hours in a day to maximize - which can include marriage, kids, school, career, ministry, etc. - making your time limited. People who care about you will appreciate the time you make for them. Anyone else will feel entitled to your time and complain when you don’t make yourself available. Don’t take it personal! And, if you’ve invested your time in people only to find that there is no progress or no maturity, don’t assume that this time around giving them more of your time will be different. Don’t waste your time on anything that doesn’t have a glimpse of promise.
Self care is essential to your wellbeing. Always make sure you’re making some time for yourself and the things that make you happy - even if all you get is 20 minutes at night after everyone is asleep and tasks are completed. Listen to an encouraging podcast; read a chapter from that good book you purchased; run a longer bath with scented candles; take a hike. Whatever it is, do you, boo!
Priority setting will keep you focused! Be clear about your life priorities so that when you feel like a lot is being thrown on your plate, you can revisit your priorities and refocus. Having priorities will help you plan better, make better decisions, and say no to things that won’t benefit you.
Keep people around who will keep you grounded. This is my favorite lesson of all because the people who are able to accomplish much in life yet still remain humble and true to who they are, are those who haven’t forgotten where they come from. These are the ones who are surrounded by family members and childhood friends who aren’t afraid to ‘tell-it-like-it-is’ no matter what status you’ve achieved. It’s those old roots that keep you from feeling entitled and remind you that you are human like anyone else. They give you permission to fail as long as you get back up. They love you despite your faults. They show up when you need them most. But more importantly, they help you find your way when they notice that you may be going down the wrong path because no one else knows you the way they do! They are the roots you should never let go of!
Now, tell me if you can relate to any of these or if you have a major lesson you carried into 2018! I'd love to hear from you :)